About that..., Humour, Mental, Sayings, Snark

Just saying…

There’s a cloud in every silver lining. — Snark

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police

The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it’s still on the list

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad!

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common; they should be changed regularly, and for the same reason

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re crazy

You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket… I’d miss you heaps and think of you often

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target

Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity

Laugh at your problems, everybody else does

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

The sole purpose of a child’s middle name, is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble

The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with “Guess” on it… so I said “Implants?“

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments

If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhoea… does that mean that one enjoys it?

Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t

If God is watching us …the least we can do is be entertaining

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing

A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer

If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you!

Whoever coined the phrase “Quiet as a mouse” has never stepped on one!



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